Using open ended questions

It is often difficult to understand somebody else's problems, or to find out what is on their mind. And only by being able to understand each other can we be sure that we are doing the right things to help.

One way of doing this is to enable the client to continue talking by asking open ended questions i.e. questions which inspire long answers, rather than just one or two words.

How to begin questions

1. Use words like 'What', 'Where', 'How' and 'Where':

• How can I help you?
• What's on your mind?
• Would you like to tell me what's troubling you / concerning you / bothering you?

2. Avoid asking 'Why' questions, e.g.

Use continuation questions and responses

3. Ask questions that naturally lead to further responses:

• Is what you're saying ...
• You seem to be saying ...
• What I hear you saying ...
• Let me see if I understand correctly ...

The message contained in the above statements is that I'm interested and prepared to listen, and would like you to share your concerns with me.

4. Use responses that naturally lead to further details:

• I see, And, So,
• Oh, Go on, Yes,
• And then, Indeed, Really,
• That's interesting.

These words mean that I am with you, and please go on.

Ask for elaboration

5. Some questions are particularly useful for finding out more details on a topic of conversation:

• Would you tell me more about ...
• Can you give me an example?
• Would you care to explore that further?
• Is there anything else you would like to say about that?
• Is there more to it than that?

Focus on feelings

6. Use questions to find out how clients feel - this can give you a deeper insight into any underlying problems:

• How does that make you feel?
• How do you feel about that?
• How do you experience that?
• You seem to be experiencing conflicting feelings?